Scared

Getting this out where probably no one will see it because I’m not sharing it to the Facebook page. Lol

I’m scared. My heart giving out has been my biggest fear since getting Lyme. I’ve always known that IF the Lyme ever took me out, it would be my heart.

And now…with doctors writing “stat” on my orders…and my father asking me if I need him here…it just feels too real…too possible.

I feel like when Bella and I sat under an underpass through a tornado. Me sitting there, crying on the inside, while it seemed like the whole world was about to blow apart…holding her hand and telling her there’s nothing to worry about.

I don’t know what this storm is going to bring. I know there’s definitely going to be some wind…but will it be just enough wind to give me a breeze when I can run again? Or will it be gusts of wind that level my world?

Guess I’ll find out Monday…