A’ight, God. I Get It Now.

I have always been a firm believer that everything happens for a reason. It is a comfort to me to know that all of the deep valleys in life have also brought me to my highest peaks.

And yet…we always forget that in the moment as we are trapped in circumstances.

I was reminded LOUDLY of that today.

I’ve been…let’s be real…pissed off and a total bitch…lately because I couldn’t run. My leg had basically tried to shatter and I’ve been sidelined for 10 weeks so far.

I didn’t handle it well. I kept my faith…and I knew that there had to be a reason…

But I was still pretty pissed off about it.

And then…today…God very loudly told me why that had to happen.

Today I learned that I have a condition called POTS (Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome). Basically my heart beats too dang fast, with sudden dips, but my blood pressure stays low. Put the two together…and you get dizzy spells, palpations, tachycardia, headaches…all kinds of stuff. Lyme Disease…which I’ve had for 20 years…is a well known cause of POTS.

Here’s the kicker…

My running and exercising was masking it. Both are good for me and my condition and I need to keep them up because it keeps the condition in check…but…

Had I not been sidelined from running…I wouldn’t have known I have this condition. And that would have been very, very bad.

So…A’ight, God. I hear you. I understand the reason. (And you didn’t even make me wait as long as usual for it.)

Now…my leg will finish healing…my condition will be treated (it’s chronic, but manageable)…and I can go forward with life and the things I love, but better than I was before.

And hopefully I’ll stop being such a little bitch when I feel like my plans are being thwarted. (But…probably not…I’m human… 🤷‍♀️ )