This is a big day for me in my grief journey. I haven’t left the house a whole lot, other than work, since Aaron passed almost 6 months ago. Today…not only am I deciding to leave the house when no one is making me…I’m finally getting the chance to fulfill one of Aaron’s wishes.
Aaron and I both loved Star Wars. It was one of our things. A few months into our relationship, I found these lightsabers that are actually REALLY good quality and got them for Aaron so he could play with his son with them.
He loved them so much he ordered another set to give his two best friends at work. So they could battle.
(Seriously, if you’re a Star Wars fan, check these out. https://a.co/d/i4yvp2n )
And then he got sick.
And things he wanted to do didn’t get done.
So, after he passed, I mentioned to his best friend that I had these lightsabers that Aaron wanted him to have. I promised I’d get them to him.
And then I couldn’t face going through everything.
And things I wanted to do didn’t get done.
But. Today I’m ready. I have a VERY rare day off of work. I texted his best friend. Told him I was driving out to the office today. Pulled out the lightsabers. I actually did my hair and makeup and put on real clothes (I never met some of his coworkers and I still don’t want to reflect badly on him).
I gave myself 2 hours to breathe and relax before I leave. (Self care, y’all. Lol)
And I’m doing it. I’m taking a step to push through my grief and honor his wishes.
I miss you, Aaron. More than I ever knew it was possible to miss a person. And I know your friends do, too. So, today, they will fight for their lives with real lightsabers. Hopefully not ending with one of them joining you in Heaven. But, if so, what a way to go. May the Force be with them. And also with you, my love.
*Jazz Hands* Mom 